


Checklist for Dealings with Sorcerers

by thor-the-asgardian-meme (love_from_belle)



Series: Thor's Stories [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-22
Updated: 2018-05-22
Packaged: 2019-05-10 00:57:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14726936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/love_from_belle/pseuds/thor-the-asgardian-meme
Summary: Thor's Checklist for whenever he has dealings with people who wield magic who are not gods of mischief.





	Checklist for Dealings with Sorcerers

here is my definitive checklist of how to deal with magic that does not originate from a god of mischief.

1) is the wielder of said magic trying to heal or kill people?  
if heal: ask if they require more ingredients.  
if kill: summon your weapon and retreat to higher ground.

2) is the wielder of said magic actually there? throw a stone at them to find out. (loki is not the only sorcerer to dabble in illusions)  
if yes: apologise profusely for the stone and tell your brother’s life story.  
if no: summon your weapon and retreat to the skies as fast as possible.

3) is there more than one wielder of said magic in close proximity to you?  
if no: introduce yourself and lecture the wielder on your life story.  
if yes: summon your weapon and retreat back to asgard for reinforcements.

4) does the spell being done involve any sort of bone or blood?  
if no: congratulate the wielder on not getting into the dark arts.  
if yes: summon your weapon and retreat to a random realm immediately.

5) is the wielder glowing with an odd coloured light? (does not include wanda)  
if no: breathe a sigh of relief and ask if the wielder needs assistance.  
if yes: summon your weapon and retreat to the other side of the planet.

6) does the wielder mention/have the book of the damned?  
if no: relax and try not to look threatening at all.  
if yes: summon your weapon and steal the book and lock it in a vault.

If the wielder of said magic is trying to kill people, using illusions, has friends, is using bone and/or blood, is glowing and has the book of the damned, summon your weapon, strike the wielder down with lightning, destroy the altar, kidnap and incapacitate the friends, steal the book and under no circumstances give it back to her. And then remember to move locations at least once a day. Because that wielder is going to be furious.

**Author's Note:**

> Anonymous asked: How to deal with non-Lokian (is that a word?) magic?
> 
> originally posted on tumblr @thor-the-asgardian-meme.


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